Sunday, 8 November 2015

Awak...


Assalamualaikum.. 
 
Awak, im trying my best to be a good special girlfriend for you. Im trying to learn what the best for us. Trying to go through deep inside your heart. Am I still not good enough for u? Deeply in my heart, I feel terkilan when you say i never learn to care your feelings. Am I really that useless? Never know about your heart,care about your feeling? Awak, if you know that I really love you, accept everything you have said, no regrets being hurt by you, always waiting for every moment to be with you and everything about you that I will accept with no regrets. I know sometimes could be my fault, thanks for tegur kesalahan saya. Yup, you are the first one yang tegur everything kesalahan saya . What should or shoulnt I do. Thank you, i do really appreciate what you did. Cause then I know and make the things right. Maafkan saya sebab selama ni selalu fikir perasaan saya je. Im really sorry for being selfish to you, to myself.. 

Awak, can i know something? Did you have read all my luahan yang berpanjang jela saya type cause you ask me to do that. Im glad if you dah baca.. but i really disappointed cause you didnt mention about any of them and huhh, i dont want to talk about it anymore. Cause it really hurt me. Sorry .. i make mistake again. Huhhh... im trying awak. Im trying buang rasa cemburu tu jejauh. Rasa risau, gelisah and everything .. Lelagi yang berkaitan dengan dia. I know, awak dengan dia dah takde pape pun.. but awak. People change. Maafkan saya, bukan bermakna saya ragu dengan awak. But i just afraid to lose you.. Saya tak nak rasa kecewa kena tinggal lagi. Tak nak go through being break up by someone again. It is really hard for me along the 5 or 6 years ago. Takde siapa yang sayang saya seperti mana awak sayang saya except for my family. Awak terima kekurangan saya. Tak macam ex saya. Awak kengkadang beralah dengan saya tak macam ex saya. Suka ikut kepala sendiri. Awak banyak sangat bawa perubahan kat diri saya. Tahu kengkadang awak sibuk, cuma saya yang nengada sangat nak merajuk and makan hati dengan awak.. Biasalah, tu je mampu tarik perhatian awak. Memang kengkadang terasa dengan kata kata awak. But I admit that is all my fault.. Ketahuilah, sakit mana pun hati saya.. Saya tetap sayang awak and I do love you damn much.  
 
At last, I know im not good enough to you. Tak cantik, tak kurus , chubby, gemuk everything yang buruk semua ada kat saya. But you accept me as who i am. Thank you for always supporting walaupun sometimes ada support awak tak membantu. But no worries, cause everytime you manage to make me happy .. How can I say that? Cause setiap kali merajuk dengan awak tak boleh lelama . Awak selalu buat ayat melt kan saya .. kalau marah pun sama tak boleh lelama. Maafkan saya atas kekurangan diri.. From bottom of my heart , I really love you Abe Tonjang .. And I miss you damn much . And I hope , you will be the one and last .. Till we meet again.. Farewell my dear honey bunny Mr I (*^▽^*)